I recently worked with a tennis player who had become
interested in the use of affirmations after reading that her hero Serena
Williams used them for her preparations. From a young age Serena’s father would
write motivating messages on large pieces of paper for her and Venus which he
would hang up around the court where they were practising. Words and phrases
such as “Believe” or “You are a winner” would adorn the courtside and would
become mantras that they would repeat to themselves to get themselves in the
right mindset to perform.
My client told me she had come up with some affirmations of
her own but found they didn't really inspire her very much. I asked her to give
me an example of one of these affirmations and she proceeded to mumble, in a totally
uncommitted (and slightly embarrassed) monotone, the words “I am invincible”. For a moment I glanced at her fingers to see
if she had crossed them for good luck, such was the lack of resolution in her voice.
I then asked her how “invincible” she was feeling after stating the affirmation
and she admitted that she wasn't feeling it at all.
This was unsurprising to me as words, on their own, aren't
particularly effective for instilling emotions in us. For an affirmation to be
effective they need to be stated with the appropriate tone of voice. It doesn't
matter whether that is the voice you speak with or whether it is the voice in
your head. For example, if you were to
imagine the words “I am invincible” being stated by Mickey Mouse or Homer
Simpson (go on give it a try!), can you really take it seriously? Now try it
using the voice of Darth Vader (the fabulous voice of actor James Earl Justice)
and notice how differently you feel about the phrase now.
An invincible affirmation requires an invincible tone of
voice. If you also add to that the appropriate body language, you will find it
difficult to feel anything but invincible.
Andy Barton
Performance coach
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